Breast Cancer- God will turn it into something good. Don't worry.

Life truly sucks at times!  One minute it seems that you are on top of the world preparing to go on a dream vacation.  The next day you find out you have breast cancer.  Imagine that!  Breast cancer at the age of 36.  Despite all of the exercise, watching what I eat, never smoking, no alcohol, reading my Bible, going to church, being nice to people, breastfeeding both of my kids for over a year each I still have breast cancer.  How in the world did I end up in this predicament?

I counsel my patients everyday on the 1 in 8 possibility of getting breast cancer as a woman but I never really believed I would be that 1.  My first reaction was "Lord, I do not have time for this.  I just started my medical practice.  I am the only provider in the office.  What in the world am I going to do with my patients?"  I was more frustrated than scared.  Initially the fact that this diagnosis could actually kill me did not cross my mind.  In my mind I have only viewed this as another struggle.  Until today after meeting with the Oncologist I never considered that this diagnosis could actually be life threatening to me.

Stage I, Level II invasive ductal carcinoma Bloom-Richardson score 6/9.  My tumor is very small, 6-8 mm which in itself is amazing because most tumors are not found until they are 2 cm.  However Level II, grade 6 means it is a moderately aggressive tumor.  I am ER/PR negative which means Tamoxifen would do nothing for me.  I'm also Her 2-Neu negative which means Herceptin won't work for me either.  I have what is called  a triple threat tumor which my Oncologist, Dr. Davidson, says is increasing in frequency in young, African American women.  Of course, no one knows why.  Despite all this, as, long as the tumor is < 1 cm when it is removed I should not require any chemotherapy, per Dr. Davidson.

So, here I am one month out from my double mastectomy with reconstruction wondering, "do I need to call Dr. Strickland (my breast surgeon) and ask her to take this thing out tomorrow?"  But, then I remembered what God has already promised me.  He told me from the beginning that He is and always will be in control.  "Do not be anxious for anything but in everything, by prayer and petition, present your request to God.  And a peace that surpasses all understanding will guard your heart and mind in Jesus Christ" Phil 4:6-7.  Just as I had peace when I had to deploy to Iraq leaving my husband and children, I have had nothing but peace throughout this entire situation.

So here I am, once again planning my dream vacation so that when I return I will be fully rested and at peace to undergo this major surgery.  I know God has a plan for my life and this struggle has only built and will continue to build my testimony and my faith in Him.  God promised to keep this tumor small, so I trust Him at His Word.  He promised me a long and fulfilling life, I will continue to trust.  He promised me that no weapon was going to prosper against me.  I trust Him.  He told me that I am more than a conqueror through Jesus Christ who I know lives in me. Just as God told Joshua to be "...strong and courageous..." I'm blowing my trumpet and circling this tumor and am going to shout and sing praises to my king until this battle is won.

So, devil, please note.  I am wearing that Full Armor mentioned in Ephesians 6, and my breastplate of righteousness is going to keep the cancer at bay until it removed from my body.

IN JESUS'S MIGHTY NAME!!!!  AMEN!!!!!!!